Reckless
by The Forgotten Nobody
Summary: Athos clenched his jaw and averted his gaze as he sunk his head back on the pillow. "I do not fight to die," he said stiffly. "But you do not fight to live." d'Artagnan had refrained from speaking to Athos about his dangerous habits, but then something happens and he cannot put it off any longer. Part 3 of the 'Thanks to the Thunder' series.


d'Artagnan had begun to notice something. It was something he'd realised before they had started a relationship, but that he was particularly aware of since. Whenever Athos was in a fight he wasn't fighting only to protect himself or others, he was fighting as if it were his last battle. And this frightened d'Artagnan, more than he would care to admit.

He had vowed to speak of the matter with Athos, but whenever he was about to, something else got in the way or he hesitated and therefore ended up losing his chance. d'Artagnan wasn't sure if the hesitation was from a worry that perhaps it was all in his mind and he was just being paranoid or that he wouldn't like the answer Athos gave. Eventually however, there became an instant when d'Artagnan could not put it off any longer.

d'Artagnan hadn't been there when it had happened, and it was only by chance that he had heard of it. He had been getting a drink after finishing a patrol when he heard the gossips of two men a table away.

"I heard it was that Musketeer fellow, Athos I think he is called."

"Mad I tell you, taking on five men alone. I'm surprised they didn't kill him."

That was all d'Artagnan needed to hear before he took off, cup falling to the ground. He had known Athos was reckless, but to take on five men alone…d'Artagnan only hoped that they had been misinformed. He wasn't sure how much time had passed since the incident, as word travelled at a variety of speeds, and so d'Artagnan figured his best bet to find Athos was to go to his home. With any luck he would have returned there himself, or someone would have taken him.

d'Artagnan ran up the stairs to Athos' room and didn't bother knocking. He hadn't needed to for a while now. Upon entering, he eyes sought out Athos straight away and they found him lying on his bed. He didn't fail to notice that there was already someone else in the room tending to him. A quick glance in their direction showed that it was Aramis and upon seeing d'Artagnan he gave a small smile and a nod in greeting.

"What happened?" d'Artagnan asked, coming closer to Athos to see the damage done. His face was pale and there was a mark on his left cheek that d'Artagnan suspected would turn into a rather large bruise. He was shirtless and a bandage covered his stomach. It was stained slightly red, but not enough that d'Artagnan was especially concerned. He was still not pleased.

"He was attacked on his way to see me, not too far from my house. I had wanted to take him inside, but just before he lost consciousness he insisted I bring him here. It looks like he anticipated your visit." Aramis gave d'Artagnan a knowing look and he tried not to blush. Now was not the time for such discussions.

"How badly is he hurt? And why was he attacked?"

"He has a laceration on his stomach which I stitched up, a few scratches and he'll find himself with an array of bruises in the next few days. I'm fairly certain it is the blood loss which has rendered him unconscious, but I also think that he was probably tired beforehand. He will not need a transfusion and hopefully he should wake quite soon. In answer to your second question, I do not know. We will just have to wait for him to wake up for him to answer that."

d'Artagnan frowned and pulled up a stool so he sat next to Aramis by Athos' bed. He knew he could not delay the conversation of Athos' habits any longer. Normally Athos was the least likely of them to get in a fight, so d'Artagnan knew he must have good reason to partake in one, but even so. To go against five men alone was reckless, and he could have at least got Aramis to help if the fight was unavoidable. Then again, d'Artagnan knew he would never do that. When Athos got into a fight, he didn't back down, even when it was the wise option, and he didn't involve others unless they involved themselves. d'Artagnan didn't know why he did this, but he was going to find out.

"So, I assume you heard about this along the grape-vine," Aramis said conversationally.

"Yes, I overheard two men talking about it. Is it true that he went up against five men alone?"

"Well, I only saw two men running away but there may have been more, in fact I believe only a large group would be able to do this to Athos. It is definitely true that he was fighting alone."

d'Artagnan let out an agitated sigh at that, and his knee started bouncing up and down as he waited for Athos to wake. Aramis settled it with a gentle hand.

"Do not be so concerned. The stitches won't leave a scar and he will be as right as rain by the morning, of that I have no doubt. Athos is strong, you know that," Aramis consoled him.

"Yes, but he's not indestructible, and he needs to know that," d'Artagnan muttered though he was sure Athos already knew this. He just didn't care.

Moments later Athos started to waken, letting out a groan as he opened his eyes. He saw d'Artagnan first, and gave the boy a smile that was normally reserved for mornings they woke up together and he was least on his guard. Athos then spotted Aramis and that smile was gone.

"What happened?" He asked. He attempted to sit up but upon feeling pain in his stomach, leant back down.

"You were attacked on your way to see Aramis," d'Artagnan told him, hoping to convey some of his displeasure. It wasn't unnoticed and Athos grimaced.

"Oh yes, I remember."

"How could you be so foolish, going up again five men!" d'Artagnan suddenly exploded. He had initially hoped to wait until Aramis left, but he found that the panic he had felt when he'd heard Athos had been attacked, and the fact he truly was hurt, meant he wanted the conversation over as quickly as possible so nothing of the sort would ever happen again.

"It was four at first," Athos muttered, sullenly. "Another one snuck up on me."

"Still, what were you thinking?" d'Artagnan asked, abandoning his chair in order to pace around the small room.

"Be careful d'Artagnan, one might think you care," Athos responded causing d'Artagnan to throw his hands up in aggravation.

"You know, I think I'll take this as my cue to leave. Do tell me how this little domestic turns out," Aramis said, quickly escaping before the argument grew too heated. This was not something for him to listen into.

"Of course I care about you! One would think you don't about me the way you throw yourself head first into danger without any thought to how I would feel knowing you were hurt!"

"I was hardly throwing myself 'headfirst into danger' as you say. I did not go out looking for a fight but I could not allow them to get away with their words. Regardless, it is usually you getting in trouble, is it not? I hardly think you are in the position to lecture me." Athos said with a raised eyebrow.

d'Artagnan chose to ignore that last part. "What could be so insulting to make you go against them alone?! Do you have no self-preservation whatsoever? This is not the first time I've noticed this Athos. It's like you fight as if you are about to take your last breath and I want to know why."

Athos clenched his jaw and averted his gaze as he sunk his head back on the pillow. "I do not fight to die," he said stiffly.

"But you do not fight to live," d'Artagnan said, sitting back on his stool.

Silence fell over them and for a moment d'Artagnan was worried Athos would never speak, but finally he did, though his words were said with painful meticulousness.

"I will admit that perhaps I can sometimes act…carelessly but you should not take it as anything personally against yourself. You must know d'Artagnan that since I had my wife killed, or so I thought, all those years ago I found myself embracing death. I did not think I deserved to live whilst I killed the woman I had loved. Porthos and Aramis' friendship had stopped me from seeking it out so much, but still, should I have found myself mortally wounded, I would not have cared. I would have been content to allow death to take me as I would have considered my time done with no issue."

The thought of Athos so carelessly ridding himself of life made d'Artagnan's throat clench but he did notice one thing. "You say it all in past tense. Is that not what you think now?"

"Having loyal friends by my side did hinder some of my more dangerous habits, and I will admit to having finding myself even less inclined to engage in them since you arrived, but old habits die hard."

"They had better die soon, for I will be extremely mad should you be in this position again," d'Artagnan said with his arms folded.

"Now you know how I feel every time something happens to you," Athos said airily. Before d'Artagnan could reply with an 'at least I don't seek it out', he carried on. "But I am sorry for worrying you and I will try to be more careful in the future."

d'Artagnan tried to stay mad, truly he did, but he had never been one to hold a grudge. He was just happy Athos had spoken to him at all about it. He had been afraid Athos would just dismiss his concerns. d'Artagnan sighed. "That's all I ask. You are forgiven."

Athos treated him to another smile before sliding to the other side of the bed. "Well, now that that's sorted, are you just going to sit on that stool all night?"

d'Artagnan snorted. "I hardly think you're in the best of health for such strenuous activity."

"Sex, d'Artagnan. It is called sex, but nevertheless, I wasn't talking about that. You're here now, there's no reason you should bother to go back to the Bonacieux's. We both may sleep better."

d'Artagnan could find no fault with that and so removed his jacket and boots to join Athos. Being careful of his wound, d'Artagnan rested his head on Athos' chest.

"You never did say what it was they insulted you about, and no lies. I can hear your heartbeat and I'll know if you do," d'Artagnan said, his curiosity getting the better of him as it usually did.

Athos huffed and slid an arm around d'Artagnan's shoulders. "If you must know it was about you, or rather my intentions towards you. It was rude, it was derogatory and I'll have you know that those men may have got in a couple of lucky shots, but they will never say anything against you or I again."

d'Artagnan smiled. "Careful Athos, one might think you care."


End file.
